Trust

I have been talking to clients about trust today. It hits me what a mysterious thing it is. When we talk about it, trying to define the subtle nuances of what it really means in the face of God, I find myself getting lost very easily.

Trust means something different to me than it used to. It once meant that God was good and I should believe that He would work everything out. Now it is a shaky movement forward, believing that He knows my path, journeys with me as I step, and has walked every footprint in front of me. Trust is taking an invisible hand and walking, even when it doesn't make sense - especially when it doesn't make sense. It is standing in a dark cave and making movement toward a light that may or may not be there. It is making that movement, not because of the light, but because He somehow indicates that as His desire for my life.

Trust is believing in His goodness when nothing looks good - separating God from good. Believing that He is still good even when His hand is seemingly not there. It is remaining in faith when God gives us nothing to keep us remaining.

Trust for me has moved from an action on my part to a belief in a quality of His character - a shift from being about me to being about a trustworthy Papa. Trust has become living in a fashion that says "I can't do this wrong because I don't do this alone". It is a leaning into the future because God is good, not because I am. And with that lean, knowing that He will never leave me or forsake me - ever. It is a step forward into seeming emptiness, believing that my Daddy is bigger than the apparent circumstances and situation. Like courage, trust can only be expressed when it is expressed in the face of fear and uncertainty.

Trust is believing. It is a choice. It is a dangerous action that challenges insecurity and calls for a way of being that doesn't come from ourselves, but the work of the Spirit in our feeble flesh. Being able to move forward in trust is to put our future in His hands, contradicting everything in us that screams for security and guarantees.

Trust rarely makes sense, but is always right.